Surprise Motorcycle Wedding!

One of the best things about this work is sitting across the table from someone when they ask to include something in their ceremony that is far from traditional yet very important to them and when they expect to hear “No”, I say yes.

I met Bucky and Maryann just over a week ago. The first question on the table was would I be willing to do a surprise wedding? The guests would all think it was just a Father’s Day BBQ. I thought it was a great idea! The next question came from the groom, could I do it standing on the Harley Davidson Road King that he had painstakingly restored with his soon-to-be father in law, Patrick? My answer, “Yes! If I can balance on it, I can do your ceremony from the Road King.

Not only was this going to be great fun, but I had the theme that would run through their ceremony. This was meaningful and important to both of them, they had fallen in love on a motorcycle and road trips were a big part of their life. I included references to their travels and the Road King in the introduction, their vows, and the statement of support.

This was a fun ceremony to write and officiate and I had a wonderful time getting to know Maryann and Bucky and their families. I believe I made some new friends yesterday too!

Today’s Baby Naming

I love ceremonies that welcome children. Today I helped parents Christina and David officially introduce their son Matthew to their community of friends and family.

A baby naming ceremony is a great way for parents to welcome a child to the family and honor their families while doing it. Today’s ceremony included Matthew’s grandparents, who did a reading, and his new godmothers who, along with Christina and David, participated in a family candle lighting ceremony.

Christina and David used a unity candle they had received as a wedding gift and lit on their first anniversary as their family candle today. This is a great way to have continuity in family celebrations, from the formation of a family at the wedding to the birth or adoption of a child. It can even become a new family tradition as well, lighting the candle in celebration each time your family grows. Unity candles often sit in a box after the wedding day, but reusing them this way can be an easy and very meaningful way to celebrate.

Four Wonderful Weddings on Short Notice

The wedding magazines say you should plan your wedding six months, to a year in advance. This year, I find myself being called more and more often for weddings on short notice. I am happy to say that it is possible to have the ceremony you want even on short notice.

Carrie and John: A Touch of Seuss

I met Carrie and John about three weeks before their April 25 wedding. What a fun couple, and great to work with too! I’d always wanted to incorporate a little bit of Dr. Seuss into a ceremony. I thought at some point it would come up as a reading, possibly in a wedding. They wanted a fun ceremony full of laughter and John did his part by writing his vows in verse reminiscent of Green Eggs and Ham.

Shanita and James: A New Twist on the Sand Ceremony

I inherited this ceremony when my dear colleague Wilma Quantrile passed away. Shanita and James are a lovely couple that had faced a lot on the weeks leading to their May 16 wedding. We worked together by phone and email and finally met the night before the wedding. James and Shanita decided to do a sand ceremony that included James’ mother Alice and Shanita’s grandmother Adele. To represent the love of their families, Adele and Alice each poured sand into small vases that Shanita and James then poured into a larger container to symbolize their lives being forever intermingled.

Sejal and Mayur: The Ceremony before the Ceremony

Sejal and Mayur came to me a month before their May 30 wedding for a short, intimate ceremony that would be the precursor to their full Hindu ceremony to take place in July. The traditional Hindu wedding takes several days and involves a number of different events and ceremonies. I think that made the ceremony we held on the banks of the Hudson a new experience for some of the guests who asked “that’s it” when the brief ceremony of vows and rings was over.

Kristin and Jamie: Two Families Become One

When a fellow celebrant became unavailable, I stepped in to create and perform Kristin and Jamie’s ceremony. We worked together by phone and email for a month and finally met the day of their June 13 ceremony. The ceremony also brought together Kristen’s one and Jamie’s two daughters. The three girls each did a reading, participated in a rose ceremony, and performed the sand ceremony with their parents. Involving the kids is a great way to acknowledge that you understand your wedding day is a life-changing day for them too. I have no doubt the girls will remember that day for years to come.

Renaissance Wedding Revisted

When first telling my friends and family about my decision to become a celebrant, those who knew me best asked if I would ever do a wedding in costume. The answer was yes. My motto for the topic became, if the client supplies the costume, I’ll be happy to do it! I always had a specific costume in mind though. What I was really hoping for was a Renaissance Wedding!

My chance came last year when I met Kate and Mike, a lovely, fun couple who spent their free time on the Renaissance Faire circuit. When they told me that they, the wedding party, and a large number of the guests were going to be in costume, I was thrilled. I asked if they wanted me to be in period garb as well and was very happy when they said yes.

Luckily Kate and Mike had a friend who was my size and I was able to borrow a lovely outfit.

The ceremony was beautiful and unique, right down to the handfasting ceremony and the Celtic music playing before, during, and after the ceremony courtesy of Dugan's Hooligans. Given the opportunity, I’d do another Renaissance wedding in a heartbeat!

Kate and Mike celebrated their first wedding anniversary this June 15. I wish them all the best!

Spring/Summer 2008 Remembered

Before I get started though, I wanted to take a moment to remember those families who allowed me the pleasure of being a part of their celebrations last year. It was a very busy spring and summer.

Tiffany and Jason were married on a rainy day in March in a local park in an intimate ceremony with just a few friends as witnesses.

In early May, I was honored to celebrate the welcoming ceremony for Neveah, a beautiful child who had been adopted by the same family that had adopted her sister some time before.

On May 31, I presided over the wedding of Laura and Tim at Craig Chapel, Drew University, Madison, New Jersey. It’s a lovely chapel and I recommend it to any Drew University students and alumni looking for a ceremony site.

On June 15, I had the great pleasure of marrying Kate and Mike at the Women’s Club of Glen Ridge in Glen Ridge, NJ. I plan on writing more about this wedding in the future.

June saw the naming ceremony for baby Declan. In this ceremony we re-lit the unity candle that Declan’s parents, Lisa and Tom had lit at their wedding and added Declan’s light to that flame. It was a lovely ceremony on a lake at Sonny's Restaurant on the Lake, Oak Ridge, NJ. (I will add that the owner and staff at Sonny’s were a pleasure to work with!)

On June 29, Kris and Suzanne were married in a beautiful civil union ceremony at the Grounds for Sculpture in Hamilton, NJ. The ceremony was held at the Nine Muses sculpture—one of the most interesting places I’ve ever done a ceremony and I can’t wait to go back.

On August 2, I married Sarah and Sean at the beautiful Bonnet Island Estate in Manahawkin, NJ.

I ended the 2008 wedding season in an intimate and touching ceremony in the home of Maria and Ronald. I love at home weddings!

Baby Ceremonies!

I love weddings, but there is more to being a celebrant than presiding over the “I dos.” I am pleased to say that I have been asked to preside over two ceremonies welcoming children into the world, their families, and their communities.

As I’ve met with the parents to discuss the ceremonies, one topic that’s come up is the presenting of gifts, either to the child or to someone who’s role in the child’s life is being honored.

There are a number of gifts that may be presented to your child or to honored guests that can add meaning to your ceremony.

• Beads—Set a bowl of beads where guests enter. Ask them to make a wish for your child on the beads. Then, during the ceremony invite your friends and family place the beads in another bowl where you stand with the baby. Later, you can string the beads, making a necklace or other keepsake.
• Stones—Similar to the beads. When you get home, you can place the stones in a special place in your home.
• Wishes on a page—Place sheets of paper at the entrance and invite your friends and family to write their special thoughts, wishes, or words of wisdom to your child—and even to you as parents. You can save those sheets and share them in the years to come.
• Jewelry—Get a special locket or other piece to present to your child at the ceremony. You can hold it for your baby till a special birthday and use that occasion to tell your child about this special ceremony and the friends and family who took the time to celebrate with you.—Or give a locket with your baby’s picture to your special guests (grandparents or guideparents, for example, or the new big brother/sister) as a way to honor them.
• Photo Album or scrap book—A photo album or scrap book, left blank except for a few pictures of you and your newborn makes an excellent gift for special friends and family. Present it during the ceremony with the promise of filling those pages with special memories over the years to come.
• Sea shell and other natural objects or keepsakes from special places—Present your child with your own keepsakes from special places you have visited and places you want to see as a family. Set the stage for adventures to come.
• Scraps for a quilt—If you’re crafty, invite your guests to bring scraps of fabric that you can make into a quilt for your child. They can be presented as part of the ceremony.

It's all about Family!

This month I had the honor of celebrating three weddings with a common theme. They were all about family.

Keisy and Joe celebrated their wedding surrounded by close family and friends at Bayonne, New Jersey's American Legion Hall, Post 19. Their intimate and elegant ceremony included a unity candle which they lit along with their daughter—the flame symbolized, not just their life as a couple, but as a family.

For Johana and Caridad, the short and sweet ceremony, witnessed by two good friends, was the third celebrating their long love together. The couple had been married in San Francisco and had a commitment ceremony when they filed for domestic partnership. This time, the ceremony was for their civil union. The ceremony took minutes but was no less heartfelt for it's brevity. We took a moment to make special note of their family, as they are expecting their first child this year. I wish them all the best.

My last ceremony for January was the long awaited wedding of Janet and Linford. They married in their home in the company of their daughter Nicole and Janet's sister Sharon. After 25 years together and raising two children, Janet and Linford had long been a family. Their ceremony was a celebration of their long love and their ties to family. I was touched to be a part of such a momentous event in their lives.

All in all, what a wonderful way to begin 2008.